Winifred Burkle (quietkindocrazy) wrote in live_in_hell,
Winifred Burkle
quietkindocrazy
live_in_hell

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Bad Dreams

Everything was so different, so much bigger, full of noise. Everything had changed and yet I knew that it hadn't. I didn't feel safe, it was not safe out there, it was another world, one that I couldn't remember anymore, or could, or wouldn't or- it was just big and vast and scary. My brain, my brain kept telling me this was home, but my eyes, they said something different.

I walked about the room trying to find a clean space to write, my thoughts, and my theorems, anything that could help me understand what had happened better. Finally, I found and empty space and began to write on it with my marker.

Big brains are not always better. If you can’t speak sentences of more than 2-3 words at a time without them all blending together like a summer drink, you likely cannot think complicated thoughts either. I smiled and thought about Pylea and its in habitants.

A cave, a girl lost in a cave, called it home. It was safe there, it was warm and cold and it was home. She was all alone, but it was what she knew... I frowned and went back to pacing.

It was all a dream, and I've always been here. This is what was real now, that had been just a dream. And now I was awake. A handsome man saved me from my dream... from my nightmare, and I was safe, it would all be okay, all of it. Things, the world it was all as it should have been five years ago. Things were normal. Things were back to normal.

I pulled the covers and looked out the window, the world didn't feel the same as before, maybe it was me that was changed. Maybe it was me who was broken. Maybe I just missed my parents too much. Maybe they missed me, or maybe they didn't miss me at all. Maybe they never knew I was gone. Maybe all of it wasn't real. And I just woke up from a dream.

Yeah...

That's what it had been, just a bad dream. Just a bad dream I had for five years.
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